tonight i was able to see one of the most beautiful sites that exists in this world. this universe. i was able to lay down in the middle of a road in the middle of the country and watch the stars sparkle. i was able to listen to silence.
yet rather than being filled with the satisfaction of being alive, i felt hollow from the previous conversations that occured tonight. there we sat, on our bridge, just beth and i. we sat at the top of a stoplight and ate kroger cookies, drank summer in a bottle, and invented the day of miobi. i have 42 days. which will end in. this.
not too much longer and i will be with miss annelise, big k, and beth (and others) in hottlanta. and then. and then i will be oat in a boat for a while. and no one around here will even notice.
i dont think.
we all want something, you know. every one of us is craving something. someone wants to be able to live to her full capacity. someone else just wants alaska. ("boy with heart the size of alaska.") another one wants the distance between texas and illinois to be minimized. someone else wants to be able to compliment a boy on his shoes in hopes for a true conversation. and me? what do i want?
"i want to watch sixteen candles with a boy and have it known that i will not settle for anything less than jake ryan. and the aforementioned boy will want to satisfy this need."
haha. i live vicariously through a 1980s movie.
but im alright with this. you know. i am okay with being happy for my friends. 'there is hope for you.'
im sure the jealous sound wont mind me altering their words.