i miss the four of us.
[ 2002-08-02 - 8:01 p.m.]

Everything is going around and around. In a downward spiral. I can't stop it.

I can't go to Boston now because my mom is being too immature about it all. Just because she fucking hates my dad for something she did. Its not my dad's fault that he's mad because my mom is marrying his fucking brother. I'd be damn pissed too. I just wanted to go spend time in a place that makes me happy with my family and away from the fucking worst place on Earth.

Then, I told Newbie about me not being able to go and he didn't care. He just wanted to skateboard, not listen to me whine. Then, I drive by where they are skating but don't stop because I just wanted to drive, not watch them skate. So he calls and when I tell him I really don't want to see anyone, he hangs up on me. Then, I drive by later on and STOP and he doesn't even say hi. So, I say I'm leaving and he's like "Are you leaving?" and I was like "Yeah." and he just skates off.

I visablly flipped him off like a champ.

I want a perfect boyfriend that cares about me. And I want to bring him to meet my parents that are married. I miss the days when I was little and I would play outside all day and then come in at sundown and eat cheeseburgers with my MARRiED happy family. All four of us.

Driving on Rossview always makes everything better. I even saved a turtle this time. But, when I got home, I wasn't happy.

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